Doctor Who: 5×06 The Vampires of Venice recap [spoilers]

I’m half asleep and working morning shift tomorrow but I promised you a recap 🙂 To be honest I spent the last hour playing Battle of the Immortals, a free MMO that looks like a cross of NWN and Diablo \m/ Anywayyyy recap:

The episode starts in 1580, with a man [who we much later find out is named Guido] presenting his daughter, Isabella, to be trained at a certain school run by the House of Calvierri, since there’s no future in building boats and they’re poor. She is accepted by Rosanna Calvierri and her son, Francesco, who smile a lot. Yeah. Creepy smiles and all -.- Guido says bye bye to Isabella who is then called to step into the light. Soon Francesco vamps out and the poor girl starts screaming. Just when you are expecting the opening theme to roll we are taken to Rory’s stag night instead. Rory leaves a very sweet if cheesy message on Amy’s answering machine and just then a giant cake is wheeled in, and out bursts…………. the Doctor! Oh My GOD. I nearly died from trying to restrain my laughter. See I was watching this at 3 am on earphones so as not to wake the rest of the people in the house. Matt Smith’s cartoonistic face didn’t help at all 😄 I love that man.

The Doctor then in an extremely straightforward way tells Rory that Amy tried to kiss him and that she’s a great kisser.  As expected a huge awkward silence ensues and the Doctor declares that this sounded much better in his head. And NOW we get the opening theme.

The Doctor offers Rory and Amy a wedding trip in the TARDIS to a romantic and fantastic resort, suggesting the Moulin Rouge and the first Olympics. There’s an hilarious scene between Rory and the Doctor where the latter starts rambling about the TARDIS in order to impress him but Rory apparently has done his scifi homework and leaves the Doctor a bit irked. Amy says she’s bored so they set off  and they end up in Venice… in the year 1580. Medieval, woo. Fun, fun, fun.

On their way in the city they’re stopped. Apparently you need papers to travel around Venice at the moment, because of the fears of plague which according to the Doctor should have died out years ago but the guard assures him that the town’s patron Rosanna Calvierri has seen it with her own eyes. The Doctor of course uses the psychic paper crowning himself “His Holiness”, Amy a viscountess and Rory her eunuch. LOL. They enter the city, just in time to see Guido get blocked from talking to Isabella by guards of the House Of Calvierri. The Doctor quickly runs to check what’s going on. Rory is a bit sad and bitter towards Amy (and he has every right to do so) but he decides to let go and enjoy their time in Venice.

Francesco gets approached by a flower seller. [A flower for a gil. signor?] but he isn’t interested in her flowers. Her blood though is another deal. Insert girly screams here. Amy and Rory rush to find Francesco drinking the girl’s blood but she’s going to be okay since Francesco fled and jumped into the canal o_O

Guido once again creates a scene outside the Calvierri house, giving the Doctor a chance to sneak in through a back entrance and ends up in a cellar, where he gets distracted by a mirror and freaks/is thrilled (you never know with him :P) realising that there are in fact five girls standing behind him and none of them have a reflection. VAMPIRES 😀 They  demand to know who he is and they do it in the creepy art of synchronised talking. The Doctor tries to help his way out by using his psychic paper, but accidentally gets his extremely old (as in First Doctor old) library card instead. The girls vamp out some fantastic fangs (sorry- vamp enthusiast)so the Doctor decides to leg it.

Outside he meets Amy, who quickly starts telling him about her vampire and the Doctor likewise starts rambling about his vampires and they both are extremely excited and happy about it to the point of shaking each other. Jolly.

The three gather including Guido to try and think of a way to get inside information on the Calvierri (who in the meantime we learn that are giant fish from outer space under a perception filter) Guido already knows of a tunnel leading under the house; now they just need someone on the inside, and Amy suggests being that someone. The Doctor and Rory are not too happy about this, and then they manage to get into an argument about who’d make a more convincing dad, brother or fiancee for her. In the end Rory ends up posing as Amy’s brother. In Guido’s borrowed clothes (Guido is poling a gondola wearing a shirt with the phrase ‘Rory’s Stag’ on the back and the mugs of Rory and Amy in a heart on the front) Rory doesn’t sound too convincing but the Calvierris seem to buy it.  Francesco is acting as if he’s seen Amy before which makes you think what the heck did Amy do to have that crack follow her and shown her face  on a distant world. Because I bet the Fish dudes saw her through the crack. And she must have been doing something important to takes so much notice of her.

Amy is taken to a dormitory and is ordered to change clothes. In the room she comes across a very frightened Isabella, and learns that the Calvierri are bringing about some sort of change in her that makes the sunlight burn her.

As the Doctor and Rory make their way through the secret tunnel, Amy goes to the entrance of the tunnel to let them in but ends up getting captured instead, and strapped into a chair so that she can be bitten by Rosanna. The process works like this: they drain her of all her blood and then fill her with theirs instead, making her one of them. EW! Amy kicks some technological item at Rosanna’s waist, the perception filter fails and she turns into THE GIANT FISH FROM OUTER SPACE! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!!! HahahHAHAHA

Just then the Doctor and Rory’s arrival creates a distraction and Isabella  rushes to free Amy. They leg it warding off the Calvierri with a lightsaber portable sunlight as they go. Amy, Rory and the Doctor manage to escape but Isabella ghurts by the sunlight and gets dragged back inside the house. The Doctor trying to save her gets an electric shock from the door and gets knocked out.

Isabella is later forced to walk the plank into the canal and declares that she’s Venetian and not afraid of water- she can swim. However there’s something living below the water that drags her beneath and apparently eats her.  Rosanna returns to her audience chamber to find the Doctor sitting on her throne. He identifies her as a Sister of the Water and asks her why she’s so far from Saturnyne. Then follows a question and answer session where they both learn things about each other and also answers some of the questions we’ve had about these huge ass fish people from outer space vampires, such as why they don’t show up in mirrors (the perception filter around them means that the brain that’s being manipulated doesn’t know what to fill the gap with, so leaves it blank). It also emerges that Rosanna and her people have had some encounters with the cracks, through which they saw silence and the end of all things.  The Fish people fled to a similar ocean  which closed behind them and destroyed their world. Rosanna intends to rebuild her race by any means neccessary and asks the Doctor to join her. Naturally the Doctor says no, and is disgusted not just by the fact that Rosanna had Isabella executed, but that she didn’t even know her name.

Rosanna summons the girls and sets them off to off the Doctor. Rory, Amy, Guido and the Doctor are having a minute to discuss -or rather listen to the Doctor’s monologue since he doesn’t allow anyone else to speak. They figure that Rosanna plans to sink Venice and repopulate it with the girls she’s transformed, as wives for her 10,000 male children that even now populate the canals and snack on anyone who displeases her. The Doctor is disgusted and mentions that the people upstairs are noisy, only there aren’t any people upstairs (of course) and the party is being attacked by levitating attractive fish girls from space. In order to save the others and avenge Isabella, Guido chooses to blow himself and the fish girls up with barrels of gunpowder he’d kept stored in his chambers screaming “WE ARE VENETIANS” (THIS IS SPARTA!).

Rosanna begins the process that will drown Venice and the Doctor rushes to stop her, after telling Amy and Rory to go back to the Tardis, because he doesn’t want any more deaths today. Guido’s sacrifice seems to have touched a touchy nerve that Rory’s already poked before: “You have no idea how dangerous you make people to themselves when you’re around!” And sure enough people tend to die around the Doctor, don’t they? 😦

Rory and Amy encounter Francesco, who decides to take the opportunity to fulfill his ambition and drink up Amy. Still labouring under the impression that he’s a vampire, Rory tries to ward him off with a makeshift cross which of course doesn’t work. Rory’s attempts to distract him away from Amy in vain and even calls him Spongebob in the process 😄  Until Rory draws the “however, your mum” card which Francesco does not appreciate. Rory’s feeble attempts at defending himself with Broomstick  are meek compared to Francesco’s swordsmanship. Rory seems like he’s about to become a feast until Amy distracts Francesco directs sunlight on Franscesco with her pocket mirror which blows Francesco up.  Thank God he didn’t sparkle LMAO Amy takes the opportunity to critique Rory and kiss him passionately. YAY!

The Doctor bursts into Rosanna’s palace, letting her know that the women she hoped to have mate with her children are dead and her plan has failed.  A shocked Rosanna flees, leaving the Doctor to dismantle the device which is reshaping Venice’s environment, creating a storm and earthquakes which will in turn create a tidal wave which will swamp the city. Rory and Amy return and Rory’s pledge not to leave the Doctor causes a certain amount of irk because of his earlierremarks.  The Doctor instructs Rory and Amy to dismantle Rosanna’s throne, which contains the controls for the device, while he climbs the tower and sets to work on the generator as the rain and thunder lash around him. It’s a tricky, confusing clockwork device, and it’s hard to figure out how to dismantle it which has a comfy off switch. The rain stop, the sun comes out, and the Doctor is cheered by the Venetians.

Rosanna mourning, walks to the canal filled with her children. While in human form, they will not distinguish her from any other human and will devour her, which is clearly what she intends. The Doctor, arrives just as she strips down and walks the plank, tries to persuade her not to jump, arguing that it is possible to live as the last of your species, you know been there, done that and all. Rosanna merely reminds him coldly that he now has two extinct species to his name and jumps in much to the Doctor’s distress.

As they head back to the TARDIS, the Doctor suggests that maybe it’s time to head off to Leadworth Registry Office for a certain happy event. Rory glumly suggests dropping him off back where they picked him up but Amy gives him a kiss and suggests that he stays on for just a bit longer. The Doctor has no objection, and Rory is extremely thrilled and agrees. Happily, Amy disappears into the TARDIS to put the kettle on/ Suddenly everything falls in utter silence. The Doctor, recalling Rosanna’s words about the silence at the other side of the cracks, is freaked out and the episode ends zooming on the TARDIS keyhole as the door closes.

  • Yaaaaay a male companion that will probably last!
  • The Doctor doesn’t want to meet Casanova as he owes him a chicken.
  • The Doctor identifies himself to the vampire girls by showing his library card. With a picture of the First Doctor on. If you look at it in close up, you can see the card is in the name of Dr. J. Smith of 76 Totter’s Lane, Shoreditch, London.
  • This isn’t the first time that an alien race fled from the vanishing of their home planet by the season’s story arc and attempted to rebuild their society in an Italian city. Coincidentally, the Pyroviles in the Fires of Pompei are fire-based lifeforms whereas the vampires are aquatic beings, and a character played by Karen Gillan was threatened, directly or indirectly, to be turned into one of their kind in both stories.

Screencaps here

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